is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Randomize