If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
