i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I think I sprained my soul last night
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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