Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
worst night to have a conscience
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
