Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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