There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize