and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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