Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
