Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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