google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
