He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
dude. I can hear the air.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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