he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
