i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
