when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Randomize