I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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