I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
