fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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