Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Sacagawea was the original milf.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Randomize
