I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
