I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
You should frame my arrest warrant.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
