Where did you get a picture of my penis
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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