Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I have so many feelings about this burrito
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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