You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
