belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize