there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
