i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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