ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
