What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
