Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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