Banned from zoo.
Again?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
