i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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