Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize