1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
