I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Your dad touched me again.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
