you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize