Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
