It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
