So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
