do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize