I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
