Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Randomize
