so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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