Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
