Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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