She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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