when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
