And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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