He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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