That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Randomize
