i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
