we're blogging at a bar
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
She bit a glass in half.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Randomize
